'What am I doing?'
HI!
So, I've been stringing this blog along for ages now. I've been on and off with trying to write and not writing and constantly living in limbo for the past year. And I'm still no closer to finding out what I want to do. The reason I stopped writing is because I landed a job, doing exactly what I'm doing now, writing. It was amazing to think that I'd be writing blog posts, but then the job fell through before it even started, and I'm sat here with all my hopes and dreams for the rest of my life shattered and broken in a heap in front of me.
I'm so torn between abandoning education and saying 'fuck you' to qualifications, but then I think 'no you want to be a journalist, you need qualifications' but then I think 'what about photography? You looooove photography' and my head is literally spinning off its axis and I'm locking myself in my wardrobe to sit and cry for an hour.
So once again I'm back at my blog, which is where I seem to always be running too when I don't know what to do. Once again I'm going to give blogging and Youtube a go. This is probably the millionth time I've said this but I really don't know what to do anymore. And with all this uncertainty my anxiety and depression decide to come running back to me as well, and I don't want to go back to that horrible place, not after I worked so hard in trying to get back to 'normal'.
So I'm writing, because writing is what I'm good at. Lets see if this time, I manage to stick at it.
So, I've been stringing this blog along for ages now. I've been on and off with trying to write and not writing and constantly living in limbo for the past year. And I'm still no closer to finding out what I want to do. The reason I stopped writing is because I landed a job, doing exactly what I'm doing now, writing. It was amazing to think that I'd be writing blog posts, but then the job fell through before it even started, and I'm sat here with all my hopes and dreams for the rest of my life shattered and broken in a heap in front of me.
I'm so torn between abandoning education and saying 'fuck you' to qualifications, but then I think 'no you want to be a journalist, you need qualifications' but then I think 'what about photography? You looooove photography' and my head is literally spinning off its axis and I'm locking myself in my wardrobe to sit and cry for an hour.
So once again I'm back at my blog, which is where I seem to always be running too when I don't know what to do. Once again I'm going to give blogging and Youtube a go. This is probably the millionth time I've said this but I really don't know what to do anymore. And with all this uncertainty my anxiety and depression decide to come running back to me as well, and I don't want to go back to that horrible place, not after I worked so hard in trying to get back to 'normal'.
So I'm writing, because writing is what I'm good at. Lets see if this time, I manage to stick at it.
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