Anxiety

HI! 

If you've watched my latest YouTube video then you will know that I suffer from anxiety. It is a very common thing and I bet you all know someone who suffers from it. I wanted to do a blog post explaining how I found out that I had it and how you can seek help.

There a different types of anxiety and  everyone's anxiety is different therefore I can't advise you on what things can help you (because they might not work) but I can tell you about my experiences. 

I first thought that I had anxiety around a year ago, I was feeling very stressed and worried about exams and I couldn't concentrate. I had two exams on the same day and I had another English assessment the day after, everything was coming at once and my brain couldn't cope with the amount of stress and I had a 'stressing out session' it wasn't a panic attack, I just had enough and I screamed and cried and sat and shook until I calmed down. My mom phoned the school and I went to speak to my head of house about the issue, I sat and spoke to him about the matter and he sorted it out with my subject teacher, so they knew what was going on with me. 

Then there was the issue of if I wasn't going to do the exam or not. My teacher said that I had to do the exam but it wouldn't matter whether I failed or not as I wasn't taking the subject as an option next year. When I was due to take the exam (a French oral, don't laugh!) another teacher, that was helping my original teacher, took me for the exam. Obviously she wasn't aware of my situation and when I failed she told me that I would have to take it again, so instantly I cried and got worked up. The subject teacher then informed the other teacher what was going on with me and I didn't have to re-take the exam. 

That was when I knew that my anxiety had manifested itself, it really shook me. When the teacher told me I had to re-take it I cried before she even finished her sentence. I didn't tell my best friend (in the class) what was going on with me so he didn't know why I was crying and he was trying to reassure me that I could do it but more more he kept saying that I could do it the more I got worked up, through the sheer nervousness of doing the exam again. 

The best advice I can give you, from my experience, is let your school know. Also let your friends know, I didn't tell them until quite a while after, and the person I was talking about earlier still doesn't know. I now try and have meetings with my learning head of house to talk over my exam preparation so that I don't get stressed. 

Different people have different triggers and one situation that could send me into anxiety central, you could be as cool as a cucumber in. If you think that you could have anxiety, either go to your doctors and ask them about it or if you don't feel confident enough to tell people (like I didn't) do your own research. I look on NHS websites, YouTube videos and eventually I had the courage to tell my mom that I thought I had anxiety. It's also important to try and describe your feelings to your family and friends and let them know what situations make you anxious and what you would like them to do when you become anxious, so they know what to do. It will make them and you feel less nervous if you do become anxious. 

Another important thing to do is face up to it. I didn't really acknowledge it until about a month ago, I knew it was there but I just brushed it under the carpet and didn't talk about it. However now I've come to terms with it in my mind and I have read up about it and my family and friends know what is going on with me it had been a lot easier to cope with, now I don't feel like I have to hide it, and I can have a 'poppey day' as I like to call them and no questions get asked because they already know. I also wanted to point out that although on the NHS website it says it's a mental illness it doesn't mean that your mad! Yes they are completely right, it is a mental illness, mental disorder, mental health disorder, whatever you want to label it. But it doesn't mean you as a person are mental! Your perfectly normal and so am I. 

I hoped that's helped some of you, I'm sorry I was rambling! I'll be back next week with a more cheery post! 

Cheerio!